We learn our speech patterns from our parents and siblings. Really anyone who was around while we were learning how to speak has a major influence on how we talk now. In fact the way we learn to talk is just watching and listening to people who already know which words mean what. It's been said that is the most effective way to learn a different language. Sure you can take courses or listen to CDs like Rosetta Stone and those are probably helpful, but the best way to really get into it is to immerse yourself in the new language. I may have mentioned this before, but I was told a long time ago that to really cement a different language in your head is to not think of a word's equivalent in English. For instance don't think that Milk in Spanish is Leche. Instead know that Leche is milk. When you picture a glass of milk, know that it's leche. It's kind of a hard concept for people because it's in our nature to try and find comparisons to what we already know.
We tend to mimic those around us, even if we're doing it unconsciously. That's how people of a certain group form accents. One person says something a specific way and other people may adopt it in such a way that everyone says it that way. Eventually that's just how people talk. If you've spent an extended amount of time with people who have an accent you may notice yourself starting to pick up their speech patterns, but eventually you'll revert back to how you used to talk once you're away from it. It makes me wonder if our brains form permanent speech patterns at an early age and if so, what does it take to alter them. I know people that were raised in another country and have been in the US for twenty years or more and they still have an accent from their country of origin. What is it that makes it so a speech pattern is more or less our default? Our speech patterns are as unique as our fingerprints.
While we're learning how to talk we start to notice that certain words have more impact than others. At first we're just so excited to be saying anything that we say everything, without knowing what it means exactly. It's only by testing out different words do we start to realize how they affect other people. I remember as a kid realizing what the word Hate meant. Before I knew the word I already knew that I hated certain things. I just didn't know how to say it. Then there was a point when I found out just how powerful a word it was when I told one of my parents that I hated them. As a child I didn't fully grasp that saying that was a bad thing. At the time I was probably mad at them and didn't like them very much so I said the word I associated with that. I can still picture the reaction they had to me saying it. If I had punched them in the face, it would have been less shocking. And as a child you start to keep track of things that generate a big effect. So if I was angry with my parents I'd throw out the word Hate like a verbal grenade because I knew it would hurt them. In a weird way it was like I was handed a loaded gun. I didn't know the kind of power I held.
Words themselves don't really have meaning. Well they do, but what's more important is the intended meaning or intention behind the word. You can make any word into a bad one by changing your intention as you use it. I could turn the word Smurf into something as bad as Fuck, even though to someone else using it, it may mean something completely different. And I used Smurf as my example because those little blue guys in fact did just that. I've known several women who can't stand the word Bitch. For them it's one of the worst things you could call a woman and that's because the intention behind the word was so ugly and demeaning. Then again there are other women who use it so much that it's essentially lost any of its power.
There are some words out there that once you say them, you know they're bad. Just the sound of them indicates something mean or crude. Then there are words that sound like they should be bad, but aren't. I remember reading a Stephen King novel back when I was a kid. I came across a word that I hadn't seen before. In the story it was used as an insult, but it had also been used in another way that confused me. So being me I decided to go ask my mom what it meant. "Mom, what does Cunt mean?" I'm guessing that was a bit of a shock. Needless to say, she told me to go look it up for myself, which saved her from attempting to explain what it was and where exactly it would be located. Who decides that a word is bad anyway? Somewhere along the way people had to collectively decide that this word was bad and this word wasn't. I think as a society we associate negative things to certain words, even if the word was originally never intended to be treated badly. The word Fuck for instance is a bad word for a good thing. Of course it's been bastardized so much that like Smurf, it can have just about any connotation.
Notice how certain words are no longer as taboo as they once were. George Carlin had a nice list of seven words that would never be used on television. Strange how 30 years after he said that you can watch FX, which is essentially basic cable, and hear most of those words. Does that mean we're getting to a point where we no longer have words that are "bad", just words that people tolerate to a certain extent?
